Category Archives: Funny Pictures or Stories

I Just Got Groomed Today

A friend of mine recently had her dog groomed. I am writing this little story as if the dog was doing it on the day she was groomed and just got home.

My Mommy had me groomed today, and wow do I feel good and look very pretty. I have a bow in my hair. How I know it’s a bow is because everybody says bow and then touches it. It really feels funny when they touch it though.  Getting groomed must be a big deal. Since I have never been groomed before, I don’t really know. You see, I’m still a puppy and Mommy wanted to wait for me to get bigger. I’m bigger now, so today was the day.

My day started out with me being put in a dog kennel and being carried, by Mommy and her friend, to the place where you get groomed. It was fun riding in the kennel, but I got a little scared when they just left me in the kennel and then left the place and left me by myself. But I didn’t stay scared for very long because everybody was so nice to me. The bath felt so good, just like when Mommy does it. But they even used some stuff that smelled so good. That’s how I know it was special to go to this place.

After they gave me a bath they took me to a table where they put this thing around my neck so I wouldn’t jump off of the table. It scared me a little bit because I have never been tied up before. But it was OK after just a little while. They brushed me really good and it felt soooo good. Next they started clipping my hair, fur, I don’t have hair. Mommy had clipped me some, but they clipped me even more.

The next thing that happened was sort of scary too. There were a lot of scary things that happened, but they all turned out to be good, so I tried not to be too scared. Well, next they turned on this thing that makes a lot of noise and blows out warm air at the same time. It was the noise that was scary, but the warm air sure did feel good. And they were brushing me the whole time that awful noise was going on. So I just paid attention to the nice warm air and not that awful noise.

When they were finished, they put me back in the dog kennel. I was so tired from everything that had happened and being scared. Being scared makes you tired, and I fell asleep.

After a while I was taken back home. The really big deal started after I got home. Everybody wanted to see my haircut. I sure did like everybody wanting to hold me and pet me saying how soft I was and how nice I smelled.

When the people had finished holding me and petting me, Mommy took me to another friend’s house to have some pictures taken to show off my bow. And Mommy knew I wanted to explore this new place. See how surprised Mommy is when I started wiggling to get down.

      

But Mommy wouldn’t let me down and started hugging me to calm me down, see her smiling. She thought she could hold me. But I was determined to get down and explore.

  Mommy thinks she’s got me, but just you wait and see.

     I try to run for the hills. Just one problem, there aren’t any hill in this house. I keep trying though, in all sorts of directions.

See me, I’m moving so fast to get down that I’m just a blur, looking for a way to get down to explore.

       

Aahh, I think I’ve found one. Have to  move fast. Uht oh, Mommy got me.

      

Will you look at this, Mommy is trying to bribe me with a treat, to stay on the bed. Darn it’s working.

     

OK, let me try my howling maneuver. Shucks, she’s too slick with the treats.

           Darn those treats, I just can’t resit them.

      

May I please get down Mommy?

           Guess I’ll pretend to do what Mommy wants me to do. But if I move a lot and make the pictures blurry maybe she’ll let me go

  

Oh no, she’s got me with a strong grip. I might not be able to get away for a little while. You see her holding me under my belly. No fair Mommy.

     Not having any luck getting away.

 

   Maybe if I act nonchalant she’ll let me go.

Please Mommy, let me down to explore this new house. Oh well, the idea was a good one

      How do you like my smile for the picture so Mommy could show off the bow in my hair, uh fur, I don’t have hair, I have fur. Sorry.

Well, I guess that’s the end of my story about getting groomed today. It was scary and fun at the same time, but in the end it felt real good. Everybody likes my new look.

What Religion Is Your Bra?

This little story was on my Facebook today in Kelly Bagnasco’s posts. I thought my readers just might enjoy it. This is so funny. I can almost see an older man asking such a question and being as befuddled as the man in the story was. Whoever came up with this little story can really make up good ones. 

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WHAT RELIGION IS YOUR BRA?
This is sooooo funny!

A man walked into the ladies department and shyly walked up to
the woman behind the counter and said,
‘I’d like to buy a bra for my wife.’
‘What type of bra?’ asked the clerk.

‘Type?’ inquires the man, ‘There’s more than one type?’
‘Look around,’ said the saleslady, as she showed a sea of bras in every shape, size, color and material imaginable.
‘Actually, even with all of this variety, there are really only four types of bras to choose from.’

Relieved, the man asked about the types.

The saleslady replied:
‘There are the Catholic, Salvation Army, Presbyterian, and the Baptist types.
Which one would you prefer?’

Now totally befuddled, the man asked about the differences between them.
The Saleslady responded, ‘It is all really quite simple.’

The Catholic type supports the masses;
The Salvation Army type lifts the fallen;
The Presbyterian type keeps them staunch and upright;
The Baptist type makes mountains out of molehills.

Oh and

Have you ever wondered why A, B, C, D, DD , E, F, G, and H are the letters used to define bra sizes?

If you have wondered why, but couldn’t figure out what the letters stood for, it is about time you became informed!

{A} Almost Boobs.
{B} Barely there.
{C} Can’t Complain.
{D} Dang!
{DD} Double dang!
{E} Enormous!
{F} Fake.
{G} Get a Reduction.
{H} Help me, I’ve fallen and I can’t get up!

Send this to all that will appreciate it!

oh, they forgot the German bra.
Holtzemfromfloppen!!

What Religion Is Your Bra

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I will put this notice on my post from now on, every time that I copy a post from Facebook, so all of my readers will know that this is not my work, but that of someone else. This, like so many of my posts have, came from Facebook. This was from one of Kelly Bagnasco’s posts, from Courtney Luper‘s photo. It’s a cute and funny little story.

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THE $2.00 BILL I TRIED TO SPEND:

IF YOU’RE AS OLD AS I AM, THIS IS A RIOT!

Everyone should start carrying $2 bills! I’m STILL laughing!!

I think we need to quit saving our $2 bills and bring them out in public. The younger generation doesn’t even know they exist!

STORY: On my way home from work, I stopped at Taco Bell for a quick bite to eat. I have a $50 bill and a $2 bill. I figure with the $2 bill, I can get something to eat and not have to worry about irritating anyone for trying to break a $50 bill.

Me: ‘Hi, I’d like one seven-layer burrito please, to go.’

Server: ‘That’ll be $1.04. Eat in?’

Me: ‘No, it’s to go.’ At this point, I open my billfold and hand him the $2 bill. He looks at it kind of funny.

Server: ‘Uh, hang on a sec, I’ll be right back.’

He goes to talk to his manager, who is still within my earshot. The following conversation occurs between the two of them:

Server: ‘Hey, you ever see a $2 bill?’
Manager: ‘No. A what?’
Server: ‘A $2 bill. This guy just gave it to me…’
Manager: ‘Ask for something else. There’s no such thing as a $2 bill.’
Server: ‘Yeah, thought so.’

He comes back to me and says, ‘We don’t take these. Do you have anything else?’

Me: ‘Just this fifty. You don’t take $2 bills? Why?
Server: ‘I don’t know.’
Me: ‘See here where it says legal tender?’
Server: ‘Yeah.’
Me: ‘So, why won’t you take it?’
Server: ‘Well, hang on a sec.’

He goes back to his manager, who has been watching me like I’m a shoplifter, and says to him, ‘He says I have to take it.’

Manager: ‘Doesn’t he have anything else?’
Server: ‘Yeah, a fifty. I’ll get it and you can open the safe and get change.
Manager: ‘I’m not opening the safe with him in here.’
Server: ‘What should I do?’
Manager: ‘Tell him to come back later when he has real money.’
Server: ‘I can’t tell him that! You tell him.’
Manager: ‘Just tell him.’
Server: ‘No way! This is weird. I’m going in back.

The manager approaches me and says,
‘I’m sorry, but we don’t take big bills this time of night.’

Me: ‘It’s only seven o’clock! Well then, here’s a two dollar bill.’
Manager: ‘We don’t take those, either.’
Me: ‘Why not?’
Manager: ‘I think you know why.’
Me: ‘No really, tell me why.’

Manager: ‘Please leave before I call mall security.’
Me: ‘Excuse me?’
Manager: ‘Please leave before I call mall security.’
Me: ‘What on earth for?’
Manager: ‘Please, sir..’

Me: ‘Uh, go ahead, call them.’
Manager: ‘Would you please just leave?’
Me: ‘No.’
Manager: ‘Fine — have it your way then.’
Me: ‘Hey, that’s Burger King, isn’t it?’

At this point, he backs away from me and calls mall security on the phone around the corner. I have two people staring at me from the dining area and I begin laughing out loud, just for effect.

A few minutes later this 45-year-oldish guy comes in.

Guard: ‘Yeah, Mike, what’s up?’
Manager (whispering): ‘This guy is trying to give me some (pause) funny money.’
Guard: ‘No kidding! What?’
Manager: ‘Get this. A two dollar bill.’
Guard (incredulous): ‘Why would a guy fake a two dollar bill?’
Manager: ‘I don’t know. He’s kinda weird. He says the only other thing he has is a fifty.’
Guard: ‘Oh, so the fifty’s fake!’
Manager: ‘No, the two dollar bill is.’
Guard: ‘Why would he fake a two dollar bill?’
Manager : ‘I don’t know! Can you talk to him, and get him out of here?’
Guard: ‘Yeah.’

Security Guard walks over to me and……
Guard: ‘Mike here tells me you have some fake bills you’re trying to use.’
Me: ‘Uh, no.’
Guard: ‘Lemme see ’em.’
Me: ‘Why?’
Guard: ‘Do you want me to get the cops in here?’

At this point I’m ready to say, ‘Sure, please!’ but I want to eat, so I say, ‘I’m just trying to buy a burrito and pay for it with this two dollar bill.

I put the bill up near his face, and he flinches like I’m taking a swing at him. He takes the bill, turns it over a few times in his hands, and he says, ‘Hey, Mike, what’s wrong with this bill?’
Manager: ‘It’s fake.’
Guard: ‘It doesn’t look fake to me.’
Manager: ‘But it’s a two dollar bill.’
Guard: ‘Yeah? ‘
Manager: ‘Well, there’s no such thing, is there?’

The security guard and I both look at him like he’s an idiot and it dawns on the guy that he has no clue and is an idiot.

So, it turns out that my burrito was free, and he threw in a small drink and some of those cinnamon thingies, too.

Made me want to get a whole stack of two dollar bills just to see what happens when I try to buy stuff.

Haha!!!!

 

Fifty Years Later

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I will put this notice on my post from now on, every time that I copy a post from Facebook, so all of my readers will know that this is not my work, but that of someone else. This, like so many of my posts have, came from Facebook. This was from Courtney Luper‘s photo. It’s a cute and funny little story.

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'I have heard this before but it still makes me smile!!!!! </p>
<p><3 SENIOR SEX <3</p>
<p>The husband leans over and asks his wife, "Do you remember the first time we had sex together over fifty years ago? We went behind the village tavern where you leaned against the back fence and I made love to you."<br />
Yes, she says, "I remember it well."</p>
<p>OK, he says, "How about taking a stroll around there again and we can do it for old time's sake?"</p>
<p>"Oh Jim, you old devil, that sounds like a crazy, but good idea!"<br />
A police officer sitting in the next booth heard their conversation and, having a chuckle to himself, he thinks to himself, I've got to see these two old-timers having sex against a fence. I'll just keep an eye on them so there's no trouble. So he follows them.</p>
<p>The elderly couple walks haltingly along, leaning on each other for support aided by walking sticks. Finally, they get to the back of the tavern and make their way to the fence The old lady lifts her skirt and the old man drops his trousers. As she leans against the fence, the old man moves in.. Then suddenly they erupt into the most furious sex that the policeman has ever seen. This goes on for about ten minutes while both are making loud noises and moaning and screaming. Finally, they both collapse, panting on the ground.</p>
<p>The policeman is amazed. He thinks he has learned something about life and old age that he didn't know.</p>
<p>After about half an hour of lying on the ground recovering, the old couple struggle to their feet and put their clothes back on. The policeman, is still watching and thinks to himself, this is truly amazing, I've got to ask them what their secret is.</p>
<p>So, as the couple passes, he says to them, "Excuse me, but that was something else. You must've had a fantastic sex life together. Is there some sort of secret to this?"</p>
<p>Shaking, the old man is barely able to reply,<br />
"Fifty years ago that wasn't an electric fence."</p>
<p>(¯`v´¯)<br />
`*.¸.*´<br />
¸.•´¸.•*¨) ¸.•*¨)<br />
(¸.•´ (¸.•´ .•´ ¸¸.•¨¯`•.•:*¨¨*:•..•:*¨¨*:•..•:*¨¨*:•..•...<br />
┊  ┊  ☆<br />
┊  ★<br />
☆<br />
FRIEND OR FOLLOW ME! I am always posting awesome stuff! You can find me at https://www.facebook.com/just1courtney</p>
<p>★☆★ Join our FREE Weight Loss Support Group on Facebook. Recipes, Diet Tips, Support and Encouragement. We have over 86,000 members and growing!! Join here>>> https://www.facebook.com/groups/gettingskinnywithcourtney/'

Senior Sex

The husband leans over and asks his wife, “Do you remember the first time we had sex together over fifty years ago? We went behind the village tavern where you leaned against the back fence and I made love to you.”
Yes, she says, “I remember it well.”

OK, he says, “How about taking a stroll around there again and we can do it for old time’s sake?”

“Oh Jim, you old devil, that sounds like a crazy, but good idea!”
A police officer sitting in the next booth heard their conversation and, having a chuckle to himself, he thinks to himself, I’ve got to see these two old-timers having sex against a fence. I’ll just keep an eye on them so there’s no trouble. So he follows them.

The elderly couple walks haltingly along, leaning on each other for support aided by walking sticks. Finally, they get to the back of the tavern and make their way to the fence The old lady lifts her skirt and the old man drops his trousers. As she leans against the fence, the old man moves in.. Then suddenly they erupt into the most furious sex that the policeman has ever seen. This goes on for about ten minutes while both are making loud noises and moaning and screaming. Finally, they both collapse, panting on the ground.

The policeman is amazed. He thinks he has learned something about life and old age that he didn’t know.

After about half an hour of lying on the ground recovering, the old couple struggle to their feet and put their clothes back on. The policeman, is still watching and thinks to himself, this is truly amazing, I’ve got to ask them what their secret is.

So, as the couple passes, he says to them, “Excuse me, but that was something else. You must’ve had a fantastic sex life together. Is there some sort of secret to this?”

Shaking, the old man is barely able to reply,
“Fifty years ago that wasn’t an electric fence.”

 

This Blew My Mind

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I will put this notice on my post from now on, every time that I copy a post from Facebook, so all of my readers will know that this is not my work, but that of someone else. This, like so many of my posts have, came from Facebook. This is from a post titled This Blew My Mind. The URL is http://www.thisblewmymind.com, but it doesn’t take you to the website that I am talking about. I copied the post below so that you could read what the slide show had on it.

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(The video is a series of typed printed slides. I went through the whole video and copied them down on paper and have rewritten them below the second “This Blew My Mind.”)

Does this bring back good childhood memories for you?
What was your favorite thing to do as a child?
Share with friends and family, take them for a ride down memory lane.
http://www.thisblewmymind.com
This Blew My Mind

Close Your Eyes…..And Go Back.

GO BACK.

….Before the internet or PC or the MAC….

….Before semi-automatics and crack….

….Before Playstation, SEGA, Super Nintendo, even before Atari….

….Before cell phones, CDs, DVDs, voicemail and e-mail….

….Go way back, way…..way….way back.

I’m talkin’ bout hide and seek at dusk

Red light, Green light

Red Rover….Red Rover….

Playing kickball & dodgeball until the first…no…second…no…third

street light came on

Ring around the Rosie

London Bridge

Hot Potato

Hop Scotch

Jump Rope

You’re It!!

Parents stood on the front porch and yelled (or whistled) for you to

come home – no pagers or cell phones.

Take One Giant Step….May I?

Seeing shapes in the clouds.

Endless summer days and hot summer nights (no A/C) with the windows open.

The sound of crickets.

Running through the sprinkler.

Cereal boxes with that GREAT prize in the bottom.

Cracker Jacks with the same thing.

Ice Pops with 2 sticks you could break and share with a friend.

.. but wait….there’s more…

Watching Saturday morning cartoons Tom and Jerry, serial adventures, Captain Midnight,

Cisco Kid, The Lone Ranger, Boston Blackie.

Catchin’ lightning bugs in a jar

Christmas morning

Your first day of school.

Bedtime Prayers and Goodnight Kisses.

Climbing trees.

Swinging as high as you could in those long swings to try and reach the sky.

A million mosquito bites and sticky fingers.

Jumpin’ down the steps.

Jumpin’ on the bed.

Pillow fights.

Runnin’ home from the western movie you just saw ’til you were out of breath.

Laughing so hard your stomach hurt.

Being tired from PLAYING.

WORK: meant taking out the garbage, cutting the grass, washing the car, or doing the dishes.

Your first crush.

Your first kiss (I mean the one that you kept your mouth CLOSED and your eyes OPEN).

Rainy days at school and the smell of damp concrete and chalk erasers.

Oh, I’m not finished yet….

Kool-Aid was the drink of the summer, so was a swig from the hose.

Giving your friends a ride on your handlebars of your bike.

Attaching pieces of cardboard to your bike frame to rub against your spokes.

Wearing your new shoes on the first day of school.

Class field trips with soggy sandwiches.

When nearly everyone’s mom was at home when the kids got there from school.

When a quarter seemed like a fair allowance, and another quarter a MIRACLE.

When ANY parent could discipline ANY kid, or feed him, or use him to carry groceries….

And nobody, not even the kid, thought a thing of it.

When your parents took you to the cafeteria and it was a real treat.

When being sent to the principal’s office was nothing compared to the fate that awaited

you at home.

Basically, we were in fear for our lives but it wasn’t because of drive by shootings, drugs,

gangs, etc. We simply did not want our parents to get mad at us.

Didn’t that feel good? Just to go back and say, “Yeah, I remember that!” Well let’s keep

going!..

Let’s go back to the time when….

Decisions were made by going “eeny-meeny-miney-mo”

Mistakes were corrected by simply exclaiming, “do over!”

“Race Issues” meant arguing about who ran the fastest.

Catching fireflies could happily occupy an entire evening.

It wasn’t odd to have two or three “best” friends.

The worst thing you could catch from the opposite sex was cooties.

Nobody was prettier than Mom.

Scrapes and bruises were kissed by mom and made better.

Getting a foot of snow was a dream come true.

Abilities were discovered because of a “double-dog-dare”

Spinning around, getting dizzy and falling down was cause for giggles.

The worst embarrassment was being picked last for a team.

Water balloons were the ultimate, ultimate weapon.

If you can remember most or all of these, then you have lived during a more pleasant

simpler time!

 

I wonder how many of you that I have sent this to remember all of these things. I know some

of you are my vintage.

 

The slide show has ended.

 

Those of you who remember will have lived in an era that no one else will ever experience. The era has passed and slowly those of us who lived it are passing also. If you do not remember, then ask your parents, grandparents, or great grandparents. We went from am radio to the stars. Your era is here, be part of it. Make it worthwhile for future generations to build on.

 

Keep God in your lives.

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I grew up during that time. Most of “playtime” included using sticks or rocks as different things like a sword or a chair for your doll to sit on. We used to mix up dirt, flowers, leaves and water for “supper” for our dolls. There was no such thing as plastic food back then.

Television was in black and white and had tubes that made them run and they burned out quite often. There were only three channels besides the Public Broadcast Station (PBS). Color TV had not been invented yet either. That would come in 1969.  FM radio had not even been discovered or invented, or whatever you call it.

Television_set_from_the_early_1950s_crop

   old television insides

    picture tube from old television

  individual TV tubes

Records came in three sizes and speeds, which were 78 RPMs, 45 RPMs, and 33 and 1/3 RPMs. RPM -Revolutions Per Minute. Even the hole in the middle of the records was a different size for each speed. Notice the difference in the pictures of the records below. You can even see the little funny shaped disc in the middle of the one that is 33 and 1/3 record so that it could be played on a regular record player. You either had to put the disc in the middle of each record or a special attachment on the record player itself to be able to play the 33 and 1/3 records. If you didn’t want a whole phonograph player, you could buy just a turntable to play the records with.

    this is a 78 RPM record

 

      this is a 45 RPM record

                  this is a 33 and 1/3 RPM record

     disc insert for 33 and 1/3 records

     attachments that go on phonograph or turntable

    record player with attachment

     turntable without attachment

Telephones had a hand held receiver and a base with a dial pad that had 10 holes in it and it was numbered from 0 to 9, and you put your finger in the hole corresponding to the number you wanted to call and then turned the dial to the right until it came all the way around to the stopper.

080-1-rotary-phone_2-by-rg

Those were the days when parents could actually discipline their children. When you did something wrong your Mom, Dad, or whoever would call you to them to be punished. You knew if they only called your first name you could wait a little while before you had to go running to them. If they added your middle name to it when you were called, you had better not wait too long to go, but if they called your FULL NAME, you knew you had better get there as fast as you could because the longer you waited, the worse it would be. And if you were one that had your legs hit with a switch, you better pick a switch of the right size, or they would pick it for you. You learned really quickly what size of a switch to pick. Once the proper switch was picked, you got three hits on the back of your legs and that was it. At least that was how it was done if it was done properly. Of course there were always the parents that went overboard and actually beat and/or whipped their children unmercifully, and some would actually draw blood. Those were the parents that got in trouble by the police.

Things were a lot different back then in other ways too. It didn’t seem like people were as mean back then as they are now. Religion was practiced a lot more then. You actually had nice pretty clothes to wear to Sunday School and to Church, as well as dress shoes. Parents took their children to church and they went to their classes and the children went to their classes. Once the children were old enough, they went to the Church service with their parents and the whole family sat together in Church. Of course, this was before the days of Madeline O’Hare when people were free to talk openly about their religious beliefs and Bible reading, The Lord’s Prayer and The Pledge Of Allegiance to the USA were done at the start of every day at school. Unfortunately, ever since Madeline O’Hare had anything religious taken out of the schools and any place else that she could, the USA has been going downhill.

I feel like if only we could go back to that time, then things would be a lot better than what they are now. But, since we can’t go back to that time, at least the ones of us that grew up back then can have fond memories to fall back on when we think about our childhood.

 

12 Enormous Dogs That Have Zero Awareness Of How Big They Are

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I will put this notice on my post from now on, every time that I copy a post from Facebook, so all of my readers will know that this is not my work, but that of someone else. This, like so many of my posts have, came from Facebook. This is from a post from http://www.dose.com/

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Hope you enjoy seeing all of these huge dogs and some of their owners. Some one these dogs is in hard to get out dog carrier. I have no idea how he got in there in the first place.

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Posted Jan 18, by Brandon Siewert

Sometimes dogs have a way of becoming so wrapped up in their affection for their owners, they forget about their surroundings, or even their own physical size and stature (we’ve all seen ones wreak havoc with their wrecking-ball-like tails).

 

In this case, these gigantic dogs forget that, well, they’re gigantic. Either that, or they just simply don’t care, asserting their enormity wherever they so please – namely, on top of their owners. The funny thing is though, that these owners don’t seem to mind. And actually, they seem to love it. And we totally can’t blame ’em.

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11.

12.

13 Kids Got Stuck In Super Goofy Places And It Is HILARIOUS. #3 Brought It On Himself

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I will put this notice on my post from now on, every time that I copy a post from Facebook, so all of my readers will know that this is not my work, but that of someone else. This, like so many of my posts have, came from Facebook. This is from a post from http://www.dose.com/

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Some of these are so funny and some are down right scary as to what could happen to the child, and some are just hard to figure out how they happened at all. Hope you get a laugh out of most of them.

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13. Behind the couch.

12. In the couch.

11. Under this lounge chair.

10. Inside a bucket.

9. In a chair.

8. The classic head stuck between the stairs railing.

7. In a desk at school.

6. Big kid getting stuck in the baby swing.

5. In the doggy door.

4. In a tree?

3. The toilet.

2. In a chair cover? Not sure how this one happened.

1. And finally, inside a game machine.

“The Red Lights”

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I will put this notice on my post from now on, every time that I copy a post from Facebook, so all of my readers will know that this is not my work, but that of someone else. This, like so many of my posts have, came from Facebook. This is from Kelly Bagnasco’s post on my Facebook.

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“THE RED LIGHT’S”
Here’s a hysterical story that you have to ready if you are looking for a laugh! LOL

Two elderly women were out driving in a large car, neither one could hardly see over the dashboard. As they were cruising along, they came to an intersection. The stoplight was red but they went on through. The woman in the passenger seat thought to herself, “I must be losing it. I could have sworn we just went through a red light!” After a few more minutes they came to another intersection, the light was red, and again they went right through. This time, the passenger was almost sure that the light had been red, but was also concerned that she might be seeing things. She was getting nervous and decided to pay very close attention. At the next intersection, sure enough, the light was definitely red and they went right through it. She turned to the other woman and said, “Mildred! Did you know we just ran through three red lights in a row? You could have killed us!” Mildred turned to her and said, “Oh My Gosh!! Am I driving!!?”

Father Finds Horrifying Letter From His Son

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I will put this notice on my post from now on, every time that I copy a post from Facebook, so all of my readers will know that this is not my work, but that of someone else. This, like so many of my posts have, came from Facebook. This one is sort of thought provoking while reading it, but very relieving at the end. It is sort of cute.

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Lawyers should never ask a Georgia grandma a question if they aren’t prepared for the answer.

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I will put this notice on my post from now on, every time that I copy a post from Facebook, so all of my readers will know that this is not my work, but that of someone else. This, like so many of my posts have, came from Facebook. This little story is so funny. I can’t imagine that it is real, but I guess the possibility is there.

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Lawyers should never ask a Georgia grandma a question if they aren't prepared for the answer.

In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know me?' She responded, 'Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a boy, and frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, and you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you'll never amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you.'

The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?'

She again replied, 'Why yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a 
youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can't build a normal relationship with anyone, and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him.'

The defense attorney nearly died.

The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench and, in a very quiet voice, said, 

'If either of you idiots asks her if she knows me, I'll send you both to the electric chair.

Lawyers should never ask a Georgia grandma a question if they aren’t prepared for the answer.

In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her and asked, ‘Mrs. Jones, do you know me?’ She responded, ‘Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I’ve known you since you were a boy, and frankly, you’ve been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, and you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you’re a big shot when you haven’t the brains to realize you’ll never amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you.’

The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, ‘Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?’

She again replied, ‘Why yes, I do. I’ve known Mr. Bradley since he was a
youngster, too. He’s lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can’t build a normal relationship with anyone, and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him.’

The defense attorney nearly died.

The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench and, in a very quiet voice, said,

‘If either of you idiots asks her if she knows me, I’ll send you both to the electric chair.